Taurus was legendary, but never known for its hauling abilities until someone chopped and welded this unusual machine into existence.
Long before the Toyota Prius, there was a very different kind of hybrid. It wasn’t even Japanese. Ford made it and called it the Ranchero, which was effectively half car and half truck. As unusual as it was, it looked like a true factory build.
We’ve seen a lot of silly customs before. Many of them are the result of someone with a junky old vehicle, plenty of tools and too much time on their hands. They spend dozens of hours making something that’s only meant to be a chuckle-inducing spectacle. But this tortured monstrosity seems as if it was built to be – dare we say it? – functional (or at least as functional as a mutilated commuter car can be doing the job of a pickup).
Whoever spawned this automotive abomination turned the front row into the “cab” and even fitted the back of it with a partial bulkhead and window panels. Instead of just turning the former trunk into a tiny cargo box, the fabricator gutted the entire area behind the two front seats right down to the metal to maximize carrying capacity. The tops of the new bed‘s sides seem to be partially capped off to make loading stuff into the back less likely to end in a tetanus shot. Only the vertical part of the old trunk remains and now appears to function as a makeshift tailgate, complete with exposed door hinges, which were probably hastily yanked out of a hardware store bin and screwed on using only the energy from a burning hatred of subtlety. If you look closely, you can spot what appears to be a restraint that keeps this horrific half-breed’s precious contents from spilling out onto the road as it moves forward, simultaneously puzzling and enraging onlookers the whole way.
It’s easy to poke fun at this build, but it does show how human beings can use limited resources and their own ingenuity to create something. The only problem (OK, another to add to the list of many) is that we’re pretty sure this particular something hits its payload limit in record time.
Derek Shiekhi's father raised him on cars. As a boy, Derek accompanied his dad as he bought classics such as post-WWII GM trucks and early Ford Mustang convertibles.
After loving cars for years and getting a bachelor's degree in Business Management, Derek decided to get an associate degree in journalism. His networking put him in contact with the editor of the Austin-American Statesman newspaper, who hired him to write freelance about automotive culture and events in Austin, Texas in 2013. One particular story led to him getting a certificate for learning the foundations of road racing.
While watching TV with his parents one fateful evening, he saw a commercial that changed his life. In it, Jeep touted the Wrangler as the Texas Auto Writers Association's "SUV of Texas." Derek knew he had to join the organization if he was going to advance as an automotive writer. He joined the Texas Auto Writers Association (TAWA) in 2014 and was fortunate to meet several nice people who connected him to the representatives of several automakers and the people who could give him access to press vehicles (the first one he ever got the keys to was a Lexus LX 570). He's now a regular at TAWA's two main events: the Texas Auto Roundup in the spring and the Texas Truck Rodeo in the fall.
Over the past several years, Derek has learned how to drive off-road in various four-wheel-drive SUVs (he even camped out for two nights in a Land Rover), and driven around various tracks in hot hatches, muscle cars, and exotics. Several of his pieces, including his article about the 2015 Ford F-150 being crowned TAWA's 2014 "Truck of Texas" and his review of the Alfa Romeo 4C Spider, have won awards in TAWA's annual Excellence in Craft Competition. Last year, his JK Forum profile of Wagonmaster, a business that restores Jeep Wagoneers, won prizes in TAWA’s signature writing contest and its pickup- and SUV-focused Texas Truck Invitational.
